I am going through a little something these days. I’m admitting hard truths. I’m learning to sit in the discomfort of that, and the unfamiliar feelings that come with new behaviors and choices. I am having a hard time with being in the spaces in between. A really hard time. This discomfort sure is uncomfortable. In processing this, I was telling a good friend that I’m trying to be mindful and breathe, and to live in each moment. This is what he said:
“This moment. IS the in between. Learning to be in the moment when its boring or dull or tedious teaches you to live in the middle. Practicing gratitude on the days when life fucking sucks brings you back up into the middle. And when life is great for whatever reason, take a moment and just let it in. We are always in a rush to the next….whatever. It is all illusion. The past does not exist. The future does not exist. Live too much in either and we despair. But come back to the moment, come back to your breath, and you calm down.
So you learn to live in the space in between by practicing being in the space in between, which you do by focusing on your breath. This is also why it’s called a “practice.” And subsequently being with your thoughts, no matter how horrible they are, and then kindly and gently remind yourself to go back to the breath. Just like you learn to let go by focusing on your exhalation. It always comes back to the breath. The thoughts lose their power, and with them the illusions of past and future lose their power. It is a unique type of work. And it takes practice.
But the real beauty is when you are able to do it away from the cushion. That’s when you realize there is no sacred space anymore, nothing is sacred because it all is. There are no ordinary moments anymore. Life is now practice.
When you are determined to live, guess what? You Live.”
I have no other words.